Writing & Leaving Comments on Eggbeater, and other blogs too.

Dear You,

    Hello. Have we met? My name is Shuna and I am the author, owner, chef, writer, photographer, recipe tester, friend, confidante, father, reader, pastry chef, user, fact checker, editor, copy writer, publisher, floor sweeper, designer, poet, human being, listener, pillow, magician, dishwasher, carny, family, suggestion taker & answerer, promoter, event planner, advocate, mother, scout, community organizer, and all around everything for Eggbeater. This here is my blog, home, muse, friend, companion, experiment, book, food, buoy, compatriot, alter ego, evil twin sister, art, visual food, delight, love, heart and so much more for which there are not enough adjectives or words.

    Please consider your comment before you hit the button called send or publish or post. Please read your comment aloud to the person in the next cubicle (much of the blogosphere's traffic comes Monday - Friday during business hours), or room, or send it to someone you know who can give you honest feedback about your tone.

    Remember that email renders your tone murky at best, and various languages structure humour differently.

    Think of it like this: You go to someone's house. You have never met said person but you are going to a dinner party and you will be with people you know and people they know. People may not know your last name but they are trusting that because you have a few shared interests you will enjoy going to a new person's house. And everyone is looking forward to being fed by someone else for a change.

    During the dinner party would you wait for an opening to attack the host you've never met? Would you critique their food and tell them that's the worst outfit you've ever seen on a person?

    Please take a look around Eggbeater. You are in an ad free space. I am not asking your for donations or trying to sell you lowfat mayonnaise. When I direct you to my Paypal link it's because I am offering a service: I am a chef and a teacher and I teach because I love to teach, but also because I pay my own way and have been since I was 14 years old. I do not have a husband or wife who supports me financially when I want to take time off from paid work to follow my passions. My passion has to offer me a living, or else I cannot afford to do it.

    Moderating comments, and your knowledge that I do so, means that those of you who write nasty comments do so to hurt me intentionally. Many of you, I'm sure, have begun to notice that I am editing comments when they appear to be solely for the purpose of advertising, fighting, being mean or posting misplaced comments/questions on posts. If I have time I am answering your questions and queries a new way: in the body of your comment I am writing to you specifically in italics.

     Eggbeater means a lot to me and I am working hard to ensure it's a place for dialog, question asking, constructive criticism and critique, information sharing, education and all around basic good-hearted silliness when we all need a break from the hard stuff.

    I'm not afraid of confrontation but I expect a fight to mean something, not just defending myself against a meaningless attack. If you look closely, if you really read my words, you'll see that I spend a lot of time looking at, pondering, questioning and taking responsibility for my part in all situations whether they be joyous, challenging or difficult.

    Remember that beyond your own computer screen, keyboard and the fingers you use to type out the words you send, is a human among humans. I am a person with feelings and so are my other readers, many of whom who have been reading and following along since the beginning.

     Eggbeater is me and I am Eggbeater. It doesn't get much simpler than that. If you can't play well or nice you will be ejected from the sandbox and other blog authors who have any self-respect/ control over their content/ self-esteem will do the same.

    Please consider respecting my house rules, they are not unreasonable. I ask the same of those who enter through my front door, work alongside me, or sit in my classes, and I, in turn, give a whole hell of a lot back, through Eggbeater and also in life.

    Thank you for reading.

    Shuna fish Lydon

 

Comments

[Susan]

Shuna, this is very well said. It amazes me how free some people feel to insult someone in their own "home." My blog is fairly new and I've been lucky not to receive too many rude comments. If a comment is spammy, or offensive or insulting to another person or group, I remove it. If it is rude or insulting to me alone, I may remove it, but I'm more likely to leave it up without responding to it. I feel such negativity ultimately embarrasses and reflects poorly on the commenter more than it hurts me, and maybe they'll think twice about doing it again. On the other hand, if they were to email me with an apology and request that I take the comment down, I'd do it.

[Lucy]

Beautifully said, Shuna!

[Jenny]

What a shame that you need to write this. I guess the internet feels anonymous enough for some people to feel that they can be obnoxious and offensive.

Thanks for a wonderful blog, I hope you ignore people who are small minded and stupid.

[Kelly]

Bravo! A very well written post, Shuna. Seems as if several blogs I read frequently are having to write posts very similiar to yours!

I really appreciate the time you put into this blog - and it's one of my favorite blogs to read! Thanks!

[aran]

well said shuna! I like that... my house rules... I will borrow that from you for next time.

[Victoria]

Dear Shuna,

I must tell you that once I discovered Eggbeater, I started not only reading your posts, but also your archive.

I read what you have to say, not the comments - which is what everyone else has to say - and am positively horrified that you would even have to write this post.

Your writing is beautiful, what you have to say is interesting and relevant, you go out on a limb to communicate with us, and those to whom your last post was directed should go someplace in a hand basket - and quickly.

Thank you for how much you share with those of us who really care about you. I count myself in that lucky number.

Victoria Carr

[Diane]

Very nicely said!

There are always naysayers in life, and their goal is to bring you down. Don't let them shake your equanimity, or confidence in your wonderful talent. Sail on and leave them in your wake.

[doppjuice]

I like you.

[Rachella Sinclair]

Your blog is lovely! I hope the fools who leave nasty messages don't discourage you. I've noticed that the people who write the most inappropriate things always do so anonymously. That says it all really.

[Cameron S]

Thank you for a daily treat in the form of your blog. I enjoy your photos, writing, perspective, and learn things all the time. I appreciate what you do.

[Kathryn]

Hello Shuna, I've been away to Santa Fe on vacation with no computer access and what a surprise to see this message at Eggbeater. I visit you almost daily when I can and I've grown to feel like you are a friend. My reaction to this post was why would anyone ever say anything insulting, negative, nasty, whatever? about this person who gives so much and asks for so little in return. And, she has talents that she shares with us at no charge, a very rare thing these days. Anyhow, thank you for being here, you are an inspiration. -- KC

[Elise]

Bravo Shuna, Bravo.

Eggbeater is your home, your sanctuary. Anyone who doesn't respect that deserves to be given the boot.

[Susan]

Shuna,
I can't imagine not checking your blog each day. You are able to put into words what most of us feel and are unable to express. Bravo to you.

[shelly]

Shuna, I highly recommend Spam Karma. It's a widget that automatically catches spam comments. You can also use it to moderate comments originating from a specific IP address. This means you can trash rude/spammy comments originating from the same place, but possibly using different pseudonyms. Just a thought.

[dave]

good points... some of these reasons are why I quit yelp.com, having put a lot of reviews up.

forums full of ------jerks.

[Trang]

Hey Shuna,
This is my first time visiting your blog after getting the URL from Sherry Yard's newest cookbook. I admire food bloggers like you who take the time to write and share your knowledge. Keep up the great job ;).

hello Trang! Thank you so so much for the head's up and taking a minute to visit and leave a comment! I will have to write a belated thank you to Sherry... ~ Shuna

[devon]

*rolling eyes* I don't understand where some people come from... futhermore, I am TOTALLY cool with that. What I DO know is that I enjoy reading your blog; thank you for your continued honesty and brave heart.

[Tartelette]

My grandmother used to say "il faut de tout pout faire un monde" which can be translated as "it takes all kind of people to make the world go round" to which I would reply "yeah, but I don't have to invite them in mine".
Thank you for sharing this space with you :)

[MK]

Shuna,
I don't generally comment on blogs I subscribe to, but now seems like a good time to let you know how much I enjoy your posts. I'm also sorry that you are paying a bit of a price for speaking from your heart - that stinks.
MK

[cellobunny]

I think the naysayers and negative people are jealous that you have taken the time to write a good blog. If you go on alot of blogs like yelp- everyone wants to just have a space to rant and not always constructively. They think it's their right to rant- but they don't think before they rant. Raving will get one alot farther. I hope you keep writing about this crazy profession it's inside info and interesting characters. I hope other bloggers will write similar post so their readers will also be constructive instead of destructive.

[chronicler]

It is disheartening to read a post such as this. I cannot imagine someone feeling as if they have to correct you or bring you down. You have always set such a high standard for yourself, and in doing that, it would seem it sets the pace for others. We have such a mean, discourteous world sometimes. I cannot say I would be so, or have been so giving to those who have offended me. Good on ya Shuna. Don't let the bastards get you down. (me, i just hit the delete button with rude or insensitive people)

I cannot say enough how much you make the world a better place to be.

[Alison]

I cannot tell you how much this post means to me. Last week someone took the time to leave me five (five!!!) nasty comments on five different posts on my site. I can't decide if this person is just a nutjob or maybe I killed her cat and don't know it. I've been so down about it that I haven't had the heart to write. Thanks for this beautifully written post, you are spot-on with every single point. Keep cooking!

[Sage]

People certainly get bold when they know they're anonymous, don't they? I loved what you wrote, Shuna, and just hope that even one ignorant idiot reads it and understands it.

[L. Thomas]

Shuna - Good and thoughtful writing. Vibrant photos. MMMM and food that looks mouth watering. Great job.

[Craig]

Shuna
Your words are thoughtful and inspiring. They ring loud in my ears.
Thank you.

[Liz Bernsohn]

Dear Shuna,
SELECT ALL & DELETE any negativity coming your way! I now have a favorite Blog.
I loved your reaction to the election and cried as I read it-
Food & Obama! I've NEVER spent so much time on anyone's blog or Ever responded to one (except once I had to tell Rachel Maddow to not Bullshit us with the Bradely effect).
I miss Verbena! I have never been to the French laundry but thanks for making me feel like I might have a good sense of food! You got me with meyer lemons on beets and Real caramel sauce & butterscotch pudding and the Stump coffee link- was like a mini-trip around the world. Thank you so much for managing to share your sweet, sensitive, honest responses to your world after all your hard work!

[Anne]

I am tickled I found your blog! I have learned more today and am quite excited to try some of your recipes! Since I can't afford to take culinary courses this is the next best thing and I appreciate you for sharing. You're on my list of favorite blogs.

Thank you Anne! new eyes and ideas such as yours keep blogs like eggbeater beating! ~ Shuna